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Rumour has it, Tom Cruise has moved out of his £35 million Knightsbridge penthouse over fears London has become 'unsafe'.

He is thought to be relocating to Seacroft, where it's not quite as rough.

Rumour has it, Azzy was not amused to learn he's been doing dry January unknowingly for the last 5 weeks as bar staff secretly swopped his Guinness for the 0% stuff

Rumour has it, Estelle went to a football game last night.
Obviously, she went to the wrong one so we have quickly corrected her error of judgement.

Rumour has it, Alex Honnold, a local lad from from Newton Kyme went to extraordinary lengths last weekend to guarantee himself a CRM On Tour shot glass. So whether you're climbing Taipei 101 or just the 199 steps at Whitby, take a flag and bag yourself a CRM Jigger.

Rumour has it, as part of a Leeds City Council waste food initiative, some households in the Wetherby area will soon get the chance to put their food waste into their brown bin instead of putting it in their black bin.

Lucky bastards.

Rumour has it, it's Burns Night. That night of the year when Brian has to pretend to the family that he likes haggis.

Settling your tab at the Albion on Friday night

Got a dog? Can’t be arsed walking it? Ring Jon, he can’t be arsed either but he’ll do it for peanuts and they’ll end up in the Albion

Rumour has it, the Clifford Scuba Club are meeting at the pothole on Bar Lane at 9am tomorrow. Novices and experienced divers welcome.

Feel free to copy and post this image on your profile to let friends, family and fellow villagers know that you haven't spanked your car rims on entering the village

Brooklyn Beckham Statement.

‘My mum hijacked my first dance with my wife, which had been planned weeks in advance to a romantic love song. In front of our 500 wedding guests at the Engine Shed, DJ Lockie called me to the stage, where it was planned to be my romantic dance with my wife but instead my mum was waiting to dance with me instead.

‘She danced very inappropriately on me in front of everyone, I’ve never felt more uncomfortable or humiliated in my entire life. I had to get a Dougie’s taxi back to the Days Inn motel at Wetherby Services'

Rumour has it, a massive thank you to the Wetherby Christmas Lights Team who have worked tirelessly to take down all the town’s lights over the last 3 days.

They will now enjoy a well deserved fortnight off before starting to put all the fuckers back up again.

Rumour has it, the bomb disposal squad have been spotted tearing through the village again

CRM On Tour has smashed 2,000,000 miles

As of 9am this morning, the CRM flags have collectively travelled 2,002,952 miles. That’s more than four trips to the moon and back and about 80 laps around the Earth.

Thanks to all those who have got involved and contributed to achieving this fantastic milestone.

To celebrate we are giving away a CRM On Tour commemorative shot glass, delivered free with the flag on your next trip. We have 100 glasses so it’s while stocks last.

So don’t delay, get that holiday booked, send us the dates and let’s continue the adventure.

Safe travels, CRM

Rumour has it, ex-Bay Horse landlord Mal presents Donald Trump the buckled brass plate that used to hang over the bar.

Does anyone recognise this lunatic who is walking around the village with a tiger.

When you've been banished to Tadcaster...

Rumour has it, while everyone is arguing about owning Greenland, we nipped over and secured it for Clifford.

It is now officially a CRM overseas territory.