News, views, bullshit and untruths from LS23      

Rumour has it, Olympic hopeful Usain Hanby has qualified for the men's 100m final on Sunday.

He achieved a time of under 9 seconds when he thought someone had left the shop without paying for a pork pie.

"Anywhere near the chippy please driver"

Rumour has it, Clifford AFC have appointed a new assistant manager ahead of their first home game this season
Az was unsure what Man Utd's new sponsor TeamViewer did but was hoping he could download it on his Nokia 3310

Town centre location, riverside view, stay 7 nights for free.

Rumour has it, Clarkson has been spotted on his way home from the Great Yorkshire Show
We thought Bramham Shop had got involved with the Boston Spa Scarecrow Trail but turns out it was just Jeff buying some cigs.
Thankfully, Moss Bros in York Designer Outlet had a wider variety of wedding attire
Rumour has it, Phillips is starting again on Tuesday night
Matt Azcock in Albion tap room
Just got a new fifty out of the cash machine at Costcutter. Seems legit.
Rumour has it, Marcus Rashford has just arrived in BSpa. He heard there were some Hungary fans in the village.
Rumour has it, Flight Lieutenant Ryan Bray (Red 9) goes by the call sign "Hot Tub”
Clifford Juniors arriving safely back at Leeds Bradford airport last night following their mid week evening fixture in the Outer Hebrides.
Rumour has it, Neil has been busy stocking the Costcutter fridges with different beers for the Euros.
He has San Miguel for when Spain play because it's Spanish.
Becks for when Germany play because it's German.
Kronenbourg 1664 for when France play because it's French.
And Carling for when Scotland play because it's shit.

Rumour has it, Dougie’s have just had a delivery of patio gas, which is officially now more expensive per litre than Peroni at Tom Foolery.

Mum was delighted when she finally managed to order a small Sauvignon Blanc on the ‘Your Round’ app at the Crown.
Jim is settling into his new home and looking forward to the Bingo at 7pm
Rumour has it, day 2 of his holiday and Jacko had already mastered "hanging ten”
Rumour has it, the new 'Yorkshire variant' is believed to have originated from Bramham. Symptoms include the growth of an extra finger, webbed feet and the ability to play stringed instruments very quickly.
BBC’s Martin Bashir manipulated celebrities into interviews...lousy bastard.
The new artwork at the Crown looks mint
Congratulation to Darren Danby on passing his cycling proficiency test yesterday
First day in Israel on hols with the family.
Weather is good, food and beer top notch, hotel is a bit shite
Can I count on your vote?

"It's great to be back to normal" says Champ downing six pints on a Thursday morning

Deightz goes mortgage free with new hand built luxury home
Congratulations to the syndicate at Clifford Moor Farm Kennels for winning £500 on the lottery last night.

"Wetherby Fella"

Dougie Yeadons warns price increases are likely due to some cargo ship stuck in Wetherby
Boris has just announced that anyone showing a #RumourVIP card when entering a pub will not need a separate vaccination passport
Summer Holidays 2021

Government confirms there’s no shortage of vaccine in LS23

Rumour has it, Jacko has released a little equity from his house this year to see him through the first day of the Cheltenham Festival.
When the family paid £32 million for your wedding but you got married in secret 3 days before